The best upbringing of a person is to have a pleasant face.
the philosopher Goethe once said:
A man's politeness is a mirror that shows his portrait.
as the saying goes, "everyone has a temper, it is instinct to take it out, and it is the ability to hold it down."
in life, we can really see a person's upbringing from his attitude towards others.
people who are really educated always treat the people around them with a pleasant face.
01
to treat parents with a pleasant face, it is filial piety
Zi Xia asked filial piety, Confucius sighed that "color is difficult"!
in Confucius' view, it is too difficult for children to do everything and always have a pleasant face in front of their parents when they fulfill their filial piety.
Confucius asked Zi Xia that the parents were sweeping the floor, the children took it over and gave it to their parents when they had delicious food. Do you think this is filial piety?
this is not necessarily filial piety.
"Why?" Confucius explained.
because "color is difficult", children's attitude towards their parents is the most important.
in an interview, the host asked Zhou Guoping, "Why do we all leave our good temper to outsiders and bad temper to those we love most?"
even the elegant philosopher said, "I often make this mistake."
Zhou Guoping said: "it is instinct to be critical of those close to you, but it is a kind of upbringing to overcome your instinct and not to be critical of those close to you."
I have seen such a story on the Internet before:
A netizen saw that when he was shopping with his parents, he had to compare the prices for a long time, and no matter what he bought, he had to pick and choose. So he shouted, "hurry up, no matter what you do, it's so inky. I'm bored to death going out with you."
after complaining, he saw his parents' remorseful look and immediately regretted it.
writer Shi Tiesheng is deeply remorseful whenever he mentions his mother.
since he was paralyzed in both legs, he often took it out on his mother.
in order not to affect his mood, his mother can only put up with his violent character and often hide out of his sight to secretly wipe his tears.
until her deathbed, she was still saying, "my sick son."... "
after his mother died, Shi Tiesheng realized: "this stubbornness only leaves me with regret and no pride at all." I really want to warn all the children not to be so stubborn with their mother. I already understand, but it's too late. "
you see, the attitude of children inadvertently often hurts the most is the parents who love us.
if you really love your parents, you must be kind and smile from the bottom of your heart when communicating with them, so that they will feel happy and happy.
that's why Sex Yue has become a moral yardstick to measure one's filial piety.
02
to treat your partner with a pleasant face is to love
some people say, "in marriage, it is the tongue that hurts more than the fist."
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I think so.
before, a reader told her personal experience:
she and her husband have been married for six years and have two children.
when Erbao was born, she resigned from the company and became a stay-at-home mother.
at first, I was fine, but after a long time, I felt physically and mentally exhausted.
but my husband is not considerate at all.
every time he comes home from work, he sits on the sofa playing with his cell phone and asks him to help change the child's diaper. He says he is tired and asks him to throw the dirty clothes into the washing machine.
their married life has become a big "tiredness contest".
she said that taking care of the child for one day was really tired, and her husband thought, "Don't you just play with the child for a day?" What are you tired of? "
my husband said that she was very tired during the day, and she scoffed: "where are you tired from the meeting? don't you just sit there and say a few words?"
she said that she was tired of washing and cooking, but her husband was ungrateful: "Why are you so tired? isn't that what you're supposed to do?"
.
believe me, two people can't quarrel over these trivial things for ten thousand years.
Mr. Hu Shi once said:
A lover is the only person in the world who is not related by blood but has to stay with each other for the longest time.
but no matter how close a relationship is, there will be a day when your relationship will be in jeopardy if you vent your discontent and stress on your partner that you can't vent outside.
the best solution to such a thing is to understand each other.
you understand my tiredness, I understand your suffering.
Life is so short that we should leave our good temper to our loved ones.
treat your partner with a pleasant face, do not embarrass each other, and know how to be considerate. This is true love.
03
it is good to be kind to strangers.
at the end of last year, in Zhengzhou, Henan Province, four migrant workers had empty seats but did not sit on the bus, but sat on the floor in the carriages.
they said their clothes were too dirty for fear of soiling the seats.
the driver tugged them on the seats and said:
you contribute to the city. Just clean the seats when they are dirty.
I suddenly thought of a scene I encountered on the subway some time ago:
it was Friday. When I came home from work to take the subway, it happened to be in the rush hour, and there were especially many passengers in the car.
at a transfer station, outside came a passenger dressed as a migrant worker, who appeared to be in his forties, dressed in overalls and covered with dust.
that car happens to have an extra vacancy.He went over and sat down sideways.
as a result, a stylishly dressed young girl pinched her nose and screamed, "you are filthy. Stay away from me."
seeing the girl's sudden attack, he looked a little bewildered and embarrassed.
but he stood aside silently without saying a word.
at this time, an 11-or 12-year-old girl in school uniform retorted: "Auntie, how come you are so grown up that you have no manners at all?" You don't even think about who built this city. If you didn't have an uncle of migrant workers, wouldn't you sleep on the street? "
while talking, the little girl went to the migrant worker and held his hand: "Uncle, you sit with me, next to my mother and father. They won't hate you."
the little girl's parents smiled and watched the scene without stopping it.
this is the real upbringing.
as the saying goes: a good word warms you in three winters, and a bad word hurts you in June.
look at a person's moral upbringing, not whether he is dressed in a suit or whether he has a high official position, but whether he can respect everyone around him, regardless of his status, whether his profession is high or low.
treating strangers with a pleasant face best reflects one's upbringing.
being kind to your parents is the proper filial piety.
it is the right attitude to be kind to your lover.
being kind to strangers is an expression of one's cultured kindness.
upbringing is the temperament that comes out of one's bones, which cannot be hidden or pretended to come out.
the essence of a pleasant face is to be kind. Be kind to everyone around you, and others will treat you with a kind attitude.