True self-discipline, never rely on hard support!

/August 2022

Zhihu once had such a question:

the answer with the highest praise is:

throughout life, both self-discipline and non-self-discipline will endure hardships.

the difference is that the bitterness of self-discipline makes life sweeter and sweeter.

as said in the Road that few people take,

"the first solution to life's problems is self-discipline.

without this link, you can't solve any problems and difficulties. "

and true self-discipline never depends on hard support.

with the right method, self-discipline can become a habit.


low-intensity self-discipline is the key to self-discipline

when it comes to self-discipline, many people will enter a misunderstanding and think that intensity is the core of self-discipline.

when you decide to get up early, you set the alarm clock at four o'clock in the morning; when you decide to lose weight, you choose diet and more difficult exercise; when you decide to study, you read two books a day.

flag is set up excitedly, but because the intensity is too strong, it hasn't started yet, and there is already a feeling of fear of difficulties in the heart, so it automatically sets up obstacles.

in this case, it is difficult to take the first step, let alone long-term self-discipline.

in fact, when we want to start a habit, low intensity is the key to self-discipline.

Anthony Trollope, a famous British novelist in the 19th century, also said:

"getting used to this thing has the power of dripping water to wear away stones."

A trivial daily thing, if you stick to it, you can win over the hard things. "

the beginning of self-discipline, action comes first.

set a smaller goal, minimize self-discipline, make it easier to leap from zero to one, and eventually take you to a new level.

the success of Ford, the famous car magnate, also began with a small goal.

when he was working for his father, the 12-year-old came up with the idea of building a machine to replace cattle and manpower.

I believe that many people have had the dream of "inventors", but this goal is too big and too far away to put into action.

Ford, on the other hand, divided it into small goals and achieved it step by step.

he started as a mechanical apprentice, asking himself to seriously study and understand the basics of machinery.

with the deepening of his understanding of machinery, he began to carry out systematic mechanical training, became an excellent mechanic, and became an engineer because of his unique creativity.

he has been in the mechanical business for more than ten years.

finally, at the age of 29, he successfully built the first car engine, achieving a goal that was impossible in childhood.

habit has no size and self-discipline has no height.

as long as you are sure what is right, have the courage to start and do it every day, there will always be the power to turn decay into magic.

therefore, when you are ready to turn on self-discipline, set a low-intensity goal for yourself, which makes it easier for self-discipline to come into our lives without stress.


flexible self-discipline is to better continue

some psychologists have summed up such a rule:

however, most people choose to give up in the middle, leaving self-discipline above pain.

I once saw a blogger on Weibo set a 30-day high-intensity self-discipline plan for himself, from getting up at 6 a.m. to going to bed at 11:00, all booked up.

this kind of self-discipline seems to be substantial and seems to work in the short term.

however, he has not lasted for 30 days, and he is exhausted.

the essence of self-discipline is to meet a better self, but everyone has their own range of self-discipline, and clenching their teeth and insisting on excessive self-discipline will only backfire.

it's better to set a flexible self-discipline plan for yourself so that self-discipline can be easily sustained.

in psychology, there is an effect called the "broken window effect": when a bad thing or behavior occurs, our first reaction is to let it continue to go bad.

We are easy to give up on the road of self-discipline, which is the "broken window effect".

I originally planned to keep reading for a hundred days, but on the 45 day, because I was in a bad state, I didn't read, and I thought I was an undisciplined person, and then I gave up the original plan.

the plan stopped eating after seven o'clock and controlled my weight, but I indulged myself again and again after a meal.

then it becomes what we often call "intermittent self-discipline and continuous indulgence".

flexible self-discipline will allow us to set a line of defense against possible "exceptions" in our minds, so as not to let it shake our plans and let the "broken window effect" have nowhere to hide.

if you are not in good shape today, just read one page; if you eat high-calorie food today, consider it a recent reward, and continue your plan tomorrow.

Don't force yourself to be a perfect self-discipline. don't ask yourself to be self-disciplined all the time.

moderate flexibility can help us release stress, make self-discipline less painful and easier to stick to.


the highest state of self-discipline is to become a habit

Grandma Moses once said:

"to really love yourself is not to sacrifice all your time and energy to strive for a brilliant future.

but in the moment, try to do what you like and have fun.

fill your heart with joy and let every day be spent in the way you like. "

I am deeply convinced that self-discipline to the extreme brings never painful persistence, but integration with life, which can be described as symbiosis with self-discipline.

writer Yan Geling managed to make self-discipline and life complement each other..

The flexibility of vintage homecoming wear with sleeves gives you a style like no other. There are massive collections on sale now!

for more than 30 years, she would sit at her desk and write for six or seven hours every day; every other day, she would go swimming for 1000 meters; every year or two, her name would appear on best-selling bookshelves or adapted film and television works.

this high yield comes from super self-discipline, which is a kind of bitterness in the eyes of others, but for Yan Geling, she enjoys this state of life very much, which makes life concentrated and powerful.

in her self-discipline, she still has the sweetness to please herself.

when writing, she often prepares high-end manuscript paper, which can make her write more energetically; dry cotton socks can make her feel comfortable when writing; and spicy noodles and aged red wine are the ritual of writing.

finally, I will take a comfortable bath in the big bathtub to comfort myself from a day's work.

this is the highest state of self-discipline.

conversely, when self-discipline requires "persistence", it is always easy to give up halfway.

because persistence requires willpower, and people's willpower is limited.

but if you turn self-discipline into a habit, you no longer need the support of willpower, which, like a part of life, is essential.

as Haruki Murakami said:

self-discipline at this stage is really your self-discipline.


true self-discipline, never rely on hard support

Wang Xiaobo said:

true self-discipline, never use pain as the background color, with the right method, it can be easily sustained.

1 start self-discipline with the simplest thing

everyone has different energy, so self-discipline will be different.

self-discipline is the right way to open the door of self-discipline.

if you want to work out for an hour every day, but always run aground because you are busy, you might as well set a low goal and do five jumps before going to bed every day.

in one minute, you can achieve your goal without pressure, and if you are in good condition, you can exceed your goal.

if you want to remember fifty words a day, but don't take action because of the large quantity, you might as well set an easy goal of remembering two words a day.

this goal can be achieved in any fragment time, and if you are not careful, you will get a double sense of achievement.

with such self-discipline, it is easier to start and stick to it, so that self-discipline can become a habit.

2 lowering the threshold of self-discipline

the pursuit of perfection has always been a huge stumbling block in the way of self-discipline.

lowering the threshold of self-discipline can make self-discipline last longer.

do not stick to formality, do not bind to time, occasionally do not finish, it does not hurt.

walking home from work is not as effective as the gym, but walking is better than not walking.

reading on the subway, although surrounded by noise, it is better to see than not to read.

if you don't finish it at once, the big goal won't change, so keep up your efforts.

when we stop pursuing perfect self-discipline, we will find that self-discipline is not difficult.

3 Let self-discipline become an instinctive

self-discipline, a process that allows you to choose between what is happy and what is right.

after the catalysis of time, the right will produce a higher level of happiness, and self-disciplined people can also feel the freedom brought by self-discipline.

people who get up early and go to bed early feel physical health in self-discipline;

people who often read feel spiritual abundance in self-discipline.

when self-discipline becomes an instinct, it becomes a habit, a hobby, and such self-discipline is everywhere.

Mr. Yang Jiang said:

"Life geometry, how much gold can be refined from stubborn iron?

but with different degrees of exercise, there must be different degrees of achievement; different degrees of indulgence must accumulate different degrees of stubbornness. "

the same is true of self-discipline.  No matter how low the intensity of self-discipline is, it is also a victory.

lower your goals and let self-discipline take the lead; let go of flexibility and let self-discipline persist to the end.